8 Emotions - Hurt
/In Recovery, we’re teaching through the eight feelings outlined in Chip Dodd’s helpful book The Voice of the Heart. And we’re adding insights from the book Untangling Emotions by J. Alasdair Groves and Winston T. Smith. The first emotion that we’ll consider is hurt. Let’s look at hurt through the lens of God’s Word.
Psalm 109
Psalm 109 was written by David, from a place of deep hurt. He admits his hurt and powerlessness and asks for God’s help. Let’s focus on the last ten verses, which show us that when you bring your hurt to God, He saves you with His love.
I see four things we can learn from David (inspired by the Spirit) in this Psalm:
First, there is power in admitting, “I hurt.” David pours his heart out to God. In verses 22-23, he writes:
“For I am poor and needy,
and my heart is stricken within me.
I am gone like a shadow at evening;
I am shaken off like a locust.”
David doesn’t put on a happy church face. He’s real. He complains openly and honestly to the Lord. Have you ever approached God like that? Have you said to Him, “I’m hurt. I hate this.”? You can. God can handle it.
When you are honest with God about your feelings, you build intimacy with Him. David, like you and me, hurt because the world is broken. And God understands.
In verse 24, David says:
“My knees are weak through fasting;
my body has become gaunt, with no fat.”
Here we see that hurt, like our other feelings, is manifest in the body. Your feelings point to what you think and believe. And your body is where feelings take place – it gives you signals when something is broken.
The fact that you feel in your body is a gift. Crying is not stupid or childish. David is the man who killed a giant with a little rock, and he did not hesitate to weep. Crying is agreeing with God that people and things have value, and that the world is broken.
Second, we see that God delivers according to His love, not yours. In verse 21, David says:
“But you, O GOD my Lord,
deal on my behalf for your name’s sake;
because your steadfast love is good, deliver me!”
In verse 26, he says:
“Help me, O LORD my God!
Save me according to your steadfast love!”
David doesn’t expect God to help him in his hurt because David is such a great guy. He appeals to God’s steadfast love.
Isn’t it good to know that when you hurt, God doesn’t only care if you are sober? Your hope is not in having a good track record before God. Your hope is that God cares because of His perfect record.
God’s love is steadfast; it does not change. He doesn’t love you any more or less right now than He ever has or ever will. You cannot earn or lose His love. I’m not asking you to comprehend that; I sure don’t. But it does mean that you can rest in God’s affection for you.
When you are hurt, don’t imagine God loving you with your level of love. Think of your perfect Heavenly Father. In your moment of hurt, God is merciful, gracious, and loving. God saves you in your hurt with the power of His love, not the weakness of yours.
Third, we see that you can worship with hope in the midst of hurt. In verse 30, David says:
“With my mouth I will give great thanks to the LORD;
I will praise him in the midst of the throng.”
David had just explained how hurt he is, and now he’s talking about going to church and celebrating. What is going on here?
David is revealing an important truth: Even when you hurt, there are things to be thankful for. You are a beloved child of God. God has not abandoned you. I am not talking about minimizing your hurt, or trying to talk yourself out of it. I am talking about reminding yourself of God’s goodness.
You don’t feel your emotions one at a time. You can feel deeply hurt and truly thankful at the same time. David did. You don’t have to minimize one emotion to feel another. You don’t have to choose one emotion or another. Your heart is big enough for many things to be going on. You can be hurt and glad for God’s love at the same time.
We see that worship takes place in community. There is a place for private prayer. And when you have experienced hurt within the church, it might be hard to find community for a season. But you were created to worship along with the family of God. Worshipping with God’s people reminds us who God is and who we are. Even in the midst of hurt, we can worship with hope.
Lastly, we see that God saves you when you hurt. In verse 31, David says:
“For he stands at the right hand of the needy one,
to save him from those who condemn his soul to death.”
This is an incredible promise. When you are hurt and needy, God doesn’t look down on you. He doesn’t condemn you. He is right there by your side, ready to save you.
What does that mean for you in your hurt? It means that hurt is only for a season. In your moments of darkest pain, it feels like things will never get better. But God has given you the gift of hurt so that you will seek healing in Him. The one walking with you through your hurt is able to get you to the other side.
Lastly, God saving us from death means that in our home country there is eternal healing.God has invited us into His forever Kingdom, and that’s good news. Because in God’s Kingdom, there is no hurt, no temptations, no disease, no disunity, and no Recovery, because you will be totally recovered. There is only life in the presence of God and each other forever.
God heals our hurts as we surrender them in this life, and we are promised complete healing forever. So we can live in the midst of our hurt with that great hope. However you feel today, you will be healed. When you bring your hurt to God, he saves you with His love – today and forever.